The rocky road back to re-commitment and trust after an affair is akin to climbing a mountain. Reaching the summit looks like an impossible ascent as partners begin the long, painful journey one step at a time. Emotionally, in unfamiliar terrain, partners feel more vulnerable than ever before.

It’s hard for a therapist to remain neutral when couples come in as the result of an affair. On the surface it appears that one is the perpetrator of a terrible crime and the other is the victim. It’s natural to feel more empathy to the non-affair partner, but your role is to save the marriage. How does a therapist:

• Support both partners?

• Stay non-judgmental?

• Deal with couples when one denies an affair and the other has proof?

• Define an affair when partners’ have different points of view?